Here’s What Goes Wrong In Relationships
Couples very often star in one another’s unconscious family of origin movies, and my experience working with hundreds of couples is that this is the rule, not the exception.
No wonder so many marriages often end and end badly. And no wonder so many relationships that don’t end—wind up looking more like temporary ceasefires rather than successful relationships.
Moreover, if our family of origin movie is unfinished, it will show up in our marriage—no doubt. We need finish it on our own as does our partner.
Again, a good marriage is made, and you need more than a blood test and a marital license to make one. You need to be aware. And you need to be prepared to make marriage an adventure, and not a parking spot for your confused and uncertain life.
If your relationships are going to run deep, bring you happiness and be an adventure, you need to have a strong connection to who you are, one that gives you the self-assurance, security and awareness to give and receive love and friendship over the long haul.
If you lack these things, then your relationships will be strained and filled with tension, problems and disappointment.
We all hunger deep down for a successful loving connection to others, and many people suffer terribly because their relationships don’t work well. And they suffer further because they really don’t know why their relationships don’t work.
The billionaire J. Paul Getty captured this sentiment well when he noted,
“I hate to be a failure. I hate and regret the failure of my marriages. I would gladly give all my millions for just one lasting marital success.”